Holy cow, where has the time gone? One minute I was writing a post about Christmas and New Years and now suddenly, it’s five months later and 2022 is almost over. The last five months have been such a whirlwind filled with some new and exciting changes. Here’s a little update of what I’ve been up to......
A few months ago I decided enough was enough with my job at the sticker company and I went on a job application spree, applying to anything and everything I could that looked like it would help me in my future goals AND would actually pay the bills. After countless applications, cover letters, interviews, and rejections, I’m happy to say I finally left the sticker making world and took on a customer relations position for another printing company. Things were pretty stressful and overwhelming for a couple months, but I’m happy to be starting this new career adventure and glad to have my sticker making days behind me.
Amongst all of that, I also decided it was time to start dating again. What a trip that has been. Covid and my distaste for bars and most social interaction (lol) has made meeting new people and dating a lot harder, so I ventured back on to the internet to try to meet new people. I felt a little leery about the online dating scene since that’s where I met my ex-husband, but in this day and age, it feels a lot harder to meet people, so online dating it is. Again, I say, what a trip it has been.
Can we just acknowledge how disgusting and degrading men can be on the internet? I can’t say whether it’s any better for the menfolk looking for a woman, but holy hell men on the internet are a special kind of brazen. I’ve had everything from proposals to “get me pregnant” to one bold man offering to lick my feet. One dude asked if I wanted him to be my sugar daddy, while another one asked me to be his mistress because he was in a bad marital situation and needed companionship. Honestly, for every decent one, there are at least two disgusting ones.
If you’re in a good relationship, CHERISH it and pray for your single friends. If you’re single and looking, I am so sorry, I feel your pain kiddos. I thought I was done with this part of my life, but turns out the Universe had other plans for me and I'm having to start back at square one, and I did not get to pass Go or collect $200. Honestly, it sucks, but what are gonna do?
I’m pretty sure a lot more has happened, but honestly the last few months have been such a blur. Obviously, I haven’t spent a lot of time working on my website, blog or art in general, but I’m hoping with the start of a new job and the next chapter of life, all that will change soon.
I wanted to share one thing that, although very small, felt like a pretty big thing. Last weekend I was out with friends and while I was sitting in a bar, laughing with my friends, I had a realization; for the first time in a long time, I actually feel content with where I am in my life. The last two years have been such a roller coaster of malcontent, anger, sadness and hurt, but this weekend I finally feel like things are starting to feel okay again. Not great, but at least okay and that's a start.
I’m not where I want to be yet, but I’ve come so far in the last two years and I’m finally starting to feel like there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Here’s a list of all the things I’ve changed or come to appreciate over the past year:
I’m not doing my dream job yet, but I’m working toward it and feel happy with the decision to seek out a new job with a new company.
I’m not living where I want to be yet, but I’m in a good situation that gives me more freedom and allows me to save money and do other things I wouldn’t be able to otherwise (like travel, add to my collections, buy things I want/need, keep my big, goofy dog, etc).
I have the best damn dog in the world, and I love him more every day.
For the first time since college (8 years ago!) I have a perfectly sized, diverse group of friends that I love.
I’m single, which honestly I don’t love, but I’ve learned to be okay with it. I’m also learning to enjoy dating and being able to meet new people.
I’ve become more independent than I have ever been in my life.
I’ve become way more organized.
I’m smarter with my money. I’ve learned to budget and save, while still being able to live a lifestyle I enjoy.
·I’ve created new, healthy habits that have done wonders for my mental health and have helped me get back on track when I do fall off the bandwagon (as we all do).
Although I still have a long way to go before I’m where I want to be, overall I eat healthier and am just a healthier person in general.
The last little thing I wanted to share, in a surprise turn of events, I got what seemed like a sincere apology from someone that hurt me deeply. For the first time in a long time, I feel
like I may be able to forgive him for the pain and suffering he caused me. Still not there yet, but the path to forgiveness and healing suddenly seems a little more attainable than it did this time last year.
To anyone going through a hard time right now, please keep going. Life can suck, but things always get better. It could take weeks, months or years, but they WILL get better. Just keep going. Find a goal and work toward it. If you can’t run, jog, walk, crawl; do whatever it takes and keep working toward that goal, whether big or small, no matter how hard or difficult the path seems. One day you’ll look back at how far you’ve come and be thankful you kept going.
Peace and Love my friends.
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